Thursday, October 24, 2013

An insight into what makes the the great Indian Weddings...Great

We Indians love our families, we love our country (I think so) and we would die for our booze. I went to a wedding recently. I had been so closely involved in a wedding only after a very long gap.
Booze can come in many shapes and sizes (of the glass you pour it in).
As part of pre-marriage day ceremonies, booze is poured in normal glasses. I know that because I had a glass of whiskey and a little bit of vodka during one such ceremony. During late night gossip sessions, booze can go into any container, such as steel glasses, coffee mugs, soup bowls. I know that because I saw some people sloshed one morning next to the new found utensils just before the wedding. I wonder how many of the pre-marriage day ceremonies have booze that gets popped open post mid night in the quiet corners of the guesthouse for relatives.
Booze often gets sneaked into the actual Indian marriage ceremony where it is frowned upon to drink. But don't worry, once you are drunk, you wouldn't even remember that old man or old lady frowning on you. (BTW, try not to throw up at least on the lucky new couple).
Another interesting place where one can find booze is usually in the trunk of a close relative of the groom. (A few years back I had one shot of whiskey and dont remember what happened for the rest of the night). A close relative of mine told me that this "Tradition" of serving the groom's side of relative s the booze right out of the truck of a car is called "Car-O-Bar". The trunk gets popped open only when the Baraat reaches the venue. I wonder if I can start a business of supplying booze in the middle of the night to the groom's best man. They are known to be forgetful and forgetting booze is not forgivable in such occasions.
A close friend of mine (who I refer to as the Enfield guy), recently purchased a lot of booze for the cocktail party. He had gathered close to 25 large bottles for some Whiskey, 14 bottles of Vodka and 10 of Old Monk Rum. At first I was shocked on hearing this, but then I realized, free booze is devoured by many. And on top of that, this booze needs to be served during all the 4-5 days of the marriage related events. So I guess, he was being conservative in estimating the booze consumption. After discussing with me the estimated consumption, the next day he went back to the wine shop to gather more stock.
Now remember, we have already covered booze in Pre-Marriage day ceremonies, during the marriage ceremonies, and now comes the post the marriage ceremony. During the reception, there is an open bar, and here, no one really judges you if you get sloshed, but it would be appreciated, if you don't thow-up on the new couple, or hit on the close friends/sisters/cousins of the Bride or Groom for that matter.
And if you happen to travel in groups to any of the venues, the journey itself is made interesting if you have the company of Bag Piper. (Bas aap,main aur Bagpiper).
All in all, its part of 'Tradition' and it would not be justified if I dont honor such a tradition. So my friends and family, don't forget to invite me to your weddings. Even we would like to share your "Happiness".


FYI, the above text has very minute resemblance to what I actually saw. Some parts are purely for the purpose of making this 'illustrative'

Tuesday, October 1, 2013

How Indians can change the impact of a simple idea

So I saw this video recently (Youtube Link), which talks about how a simple idea of helping people find parking spots is making waves in South Korea.
Honestly, I think it was a very good idea and initiative that is helping the planet save on fuel consumption, help reduce the inconvenience to people. And hence overall a novel idea. I have faith that there are always people who might be able to come up with an idea that can help in the "Greater Good". Apologies for the cliche.

However, I wonder how this situation would have turned out in India-

Scenario: A major petrochemical company (HPCL/BPCL/IOCL) puts these balloons at different parking spots.
1) People would park so wonderfully that they would end up pushing down 2 balloons - hence probably occupying 2 spots.
2) If a family drives and occupies that spot, then the balloon gets taken away for the kid. Its the birthright you know.
3) People would start placing bricks to demarcate their parking spots. Conversations would go like- "Hey, I had my brick placed there. That spot belongs to me. You wanna take it, you gotta come and fight for it."
4) A "Poor" man would want to make his "Living" (with a Budwiser?) - I am sure the balloons would be taken away in less than 24 Hours and would be sold roughly 20meters away (or if they are bold enough, right at the same spot).
5) India has a lot of entrepreneurial spirit. Indians love to monetize on resources that don't belong to them. Be it illegally encroaching land, footpaths, taking away anything of value as long as it is on the open. Some random group of people would make it a business and start charging people a "nominal fee" for parking in the "New and Special parking Lot" even if the Petrochemical company would have arranged this for free.
6) A few teenagers would probably run around the parking lot bursting the balloons to see who brings down the most. (Though I guess this one can happen in any country)
7) Uhh... I think I'm unable to figure out other possibilities of how Indians in general would have made this initiative worth nothing....

Am I being too negative and judgmental of my own countrymen?